Cameron: As influential on the world stage as a packet of wet wipes

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It can’t be much fun for David Cameron. There he is, sitting in 10 Downing Street, counting down the days until the end of his Parliamentary term while the police file in and out to arrest his advisors.

(Don’t forget they nabbed Andy Coulson before Patrick Rock, folks!)

Now he can’t even big himself up with a self-congratulatory picture tweet without some upstart, infinitely-more-respected actor fellow sending him up instead.

Determined to boost his profile by claiming to be buddies with Barack (Obama), Cameron tweeted the following:

"I've been speaking to @BarackObama about the situation in Ukraine. We are united in condemnation of Russia's actions."

“I’ve been speaking to @BarackObama about the situation in Ukraine. We are united in condemnation of Russia’s actions.”

This is the response he got, first from comedian Rob Delaney:

"Hi guys, I'm on the line now too. Get me up to speed."

“Hi guys, I’m on the line now too. Get me up to speed.”

… and then from acting legend Sir Patrick Stewart:

"I'm now patched in as well. Sorry for the delay."

“I’m now patched in as well. Sorry for the delay.”

What can we surmise from this? That listening to David Cameron is akin to squeezing a tube of toothpaste into your ear? That Britain’s comedy Prime Minister is as effective a statesman as a packet of Wet Ones? What a sad day for him if this appears to be the case!

This appears to be the case.

What followed can only be described as a deluge:

140306dogphone

"Ok, guys, thanks for holding. "

“Ok, guys, thanks for holding. “

"Hi David, where are you calling from?"

“Hi David, where are you calling from?”

Here’s one from ‘Bubba’ (@bobwiggin), highlighting the effectiveness of Cameron’s sanctions against foreign countries:

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This is from Vox Political reader Ian Davies:

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What did Mr Obama think of all this?

"David who?"

“David who?”

Sadly, there’s one image we’d all like to see, but it has yet to surface. Here’s how it might appear:

"Hello - Cam? You're a bleedin' liability, cobber. I'm off back to XXXX, where they KNOW how to stitch up an election!"

“Hello – Cam? You’re a bleedin’ liability, cobber. I’m off back to XXXX, where they KNOW how to stitch up an election!”

We live in hope.

Follow me on Twitter: @MidWalesMike

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14 Comments

  1. Barry Davies March 6, 2014 at 12:31 pm - Reply

    Pure Genius, thank you for a much needed laugh.

  2. beastrabban March 6, 2014 at 12:45 pm - Reply

    Reblogged this on Beastrabban’s Weblog and commented:
    With the veteran thesp Patrick ‘Captain Picard’ Stewart starting this trend, I think we now have photographic proof that Cameron’s reign as prime minister is, indeed, a Whitehall farce. Unfortunately, it’s one that’s leaving increasingly fewer laughing. We live in hope that this is one show that’ll be cancelled before it comes to the end of its run.

  3. delboy109 March 6, 2014 at 1:16 pm - Reply

    So so funny can’t stop laughing when you see him & the rest of his party on TV it’s so funny it’s a great comedy show lol thank you it’s Hilarious it will be sad to see him go from TV best comedy show I have ever seen & will take some beating.

  4. Joanna Terry (@terry_joanna) March 6, 2014 at 1:47 pm - Reply

    Pure genius, you made my day.

  5. Paul Smyth March 6, 2014 at 2:29 pm - Reply

    Reblogged this on The Greater Fool.

  6. HomerJS March 6, 2014 at 2:53 pm - Reply

    Love the little girl in the pub one, but my favourite has to be the ‘babestation’ one.

  7. Philip Englehard March 6, 2014 at 3:00 pm - Reply

    At least wet wipes have a use; Ca-maroon not so much

  8. prayerwarriorpsychicnot March 6, 2014 at 4:33 pm - Reply

    Reblogged this on Gangstalked and slandered.

  9. AM-FM March 6, 2014 at 5:33 pm - Reply

    I think we’ll have more of this. The Selfservatives will spend the next 14 months firefighting. Yet another:
    http://www.sheilagilmore.co.uk/press-release-iain-duncan-smiths-department-slammed-again-for-use-of-statistics/

    Rachel Reeves is on Question Time tonight, and Pinocchio is coming on the Sunday Politics 11am.
    #askIDS https://twitter.com/search?q=#askIDS&src=hash&f=realtime

  10. jaypot2012 March 6, 2014 at 6:39 pm - Reply

    Brilliant, having a damn good laugh here. Hope a load of other actors etc take the piss out of him – he’ll see then just what people actually think of him and his party :)

  11. jaypot2012 March 6, 2014 at 6:40 pm - Reply

    Reblogged this on Jay's Journal and commented:
    LOL!

  12. Joseph Smith March 7, 2014 at 7:41 am - Reply

    Excellent, except its true, Cameron is an ineffective, egotistical, immature, over-educated, useless prime minister. He’s overseeing the destruction of our democracy and the destruction of our society. He allows ministers like IDS to implement fascist policies thus causing the deaths of thousands of our most needy citizens in return for continued political support. So in addition to being a dangerous clown he’s knowingly involved in mass murder. What’s the alternative? In 2015.

  13. […] It can’t be much fun for David Cameron. There he is, sitting in 10 Downing Street, counting down the days until the end of his Parliamentary term while the police file in and out to arrest his advisors.  […]

  14. […] It can't be much fun for David Cameron. There he is, sitting in 10 Downing Street, counting down the days until the end of his Parliamentary term while the police file in and out to arrest his advi…  […]

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