You may get a visit from a government officer to check that you are being treated appropriately* for your status.
A review officer may visit you if you are:
- A member of an ethnic minority
- A member of a political party other than the Conservatives or Liberal Democrats
Your name is selected at random to be checked. You won’t always get a letter in advance telling you about the visit.
What to expect
The officer will interview you in your home and will want to see two forms of identification.
They’ll also ask to see documents about your ethnic origin, religion, and political or sexual history, including but not limited to:
- Birth certificate
- Synagogue at which you worship and the name of your rabbi
- Passport/details of your country of origin
- Political party membership card
- Medical records
Visits usually last up to an hour but may be longer.
You may be asked to accompany our officer and be conveyed to special measures* if a more detailed interview is required. You will be treated appropriately*.
Check their identity
You can check the identity of the review officer by:
- Asking to see their photo identity card and then checking their face to see if the duelling scars match.
Of course there would be outcry if the government released a press release in this form – except that’s exactly what has happened, and nobody batted an eyelid because the victims are people on state benefits.
If you are reading this and think that’s all right, ask yourself what you’ll do when they come for you. This government already has its eye on pensioners, and people who claim in-work benefits will not be far behind.
By the way, words and phrases marked * are euphemisms from an academic website and may be translated as follows:
- Action – Mission to seek out (in this case, Jews) and kill them
- Treated appropriately – Murdered
- Conveyed to special measures – Killed
What’s that you’re saying? “It couldn’t happen here”?
Oh. Well, that’s all right then.
You can go back to sleep.
(Anyone invoking Godwin’s Law will receive special treatment* for doing so inappropriately.)
Follow me on Twitter: @MidWalesMike
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