Tag Archives: riders

The Tory riders of the apocalypse may soon be complete

Nearly right: The Canary‘s satirical ‘Off the Perch’ column used Defence Secretary Gavin Williamson to stand in for War, and Environment Secretary Michael Gove for Pestilence – but the Tories have created their own posts that, while not quite equivalent, are appropriate.

We may laugh because it’s funny – but we should weep, because it’s true.

Conservative government policies have necessitated the appointment of:

A Minister for Loneliness.

A Minister for Suicide (prevention).

And now we have calls for a Minister for Hunger.

Put them together with Iain Duncan Smith, who will always be the Minister for Death after his time as Work and Pensions Secretary, and the Conservatives have their very own riders of the Apocalypse.

We can’t call them “horsemen” because at least half of them are going to be women.

And, okay, Homelessness and Suicide have replaced War and Pestilence – and suicide is a kind of death.

But the imagery is exactly right.

And the Tory government has been apocalyptic, for thousands upon thousands of people.

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