“You want me to step this way?”
“Yes, Mr Johnson.”
“Where’s my parachute?”
“Unnecessary, Mr Johnson. Honest!”

I can imagine the explanatory letter now.

“Dear Mr Johnson, we note your demand for an official plane because the model currently used by senior members of the government and the Royal Family never seems to be available… and because of its unfortunate colour.

“May we take this opportunity to explain that, when we responded in the vernacular with “UFO”, we were not referring to “You [people at the] foreign office” – or to the possibility of you enjoying the services of a commandeered “Unidentified Flying Object” (should such a thing exist).

Au contraire, we were simply responding with a common vulgarity of the kind we believe may be familiar to you from your much-publicised romantic entanglements. If not, it should be.

“With regards,


Boris Johnson is under fire after calling for his own “Brexit plane” to help him drum up trade around the world when the UK leaves the EU.

An existing RAF Voyager jet – which is shared by the prime minister, senior cabinet members and the royal family – “never seems to be available,” the foreign secretary protested.

The Voyager’s drab grey colours also undermined Britain’s reputation when the country needed a powerful “flagship”, Mr Johnson said.

Source: Boris Johnson criticised after calling for his own ‘Brexit plane’ to build up trade after UK leaves EU | The Independent

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