It’s all gone horribly wrong for Boris Johnson’s Brexit.
The government that decided to break international law – and threaten the peace in Northern Ireland – by overruling the Brexit plan to put an internal customs border – within the UK – in the Irish Sea…
… is self-imposing an internal border within the UK – where Kent meets Surrey.
So … Britain's border with the EU now looks like this.
Has anyone noticed the "oven ready, patriotic 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧" #brexit deal everyone voted for is now ceding actual physical British territory to the EU?#BorisJohnson/#Conservatives have no idea what they're doing. pic.twitter.com/r1ThUFhcym
— A Gilded Eye 🌈 (@AGildedEye) September 23, 2020
That’s one example of Tory hypocrisy. Let’s see how many more we can find.
Here’s one: the new border means the party that said it would rid the UK of unwanted ‘red tape’ is burying itself under a new mountain of the stuff; Michael Gove is desperately trying to recruit a staggering 50,000 “customs agents” to help business prepare for it.
The measures are deemed necessary to prevent the creation of 7,000-long lorry queues and two-day waits to cross the Channel after the full force of Brexit hits us on January 1, 2021.
Police will patrol the Kent border to turn away lorries without an “access permit”.
Officers will use automatic number plate recognition (ANPR) cameras and “other means” to block drivers.
So it seems any trucker without these new travel passports will be arrested in what hauliers say is an attempt to shift blame for the looming disruption onto them (Tory hypocrisy number three).
— Marcus Houlden (@mhoulden) September 23, 2020
The social media wits have really gone to town on this one (which is more than permit-less hauliers will be allowed to do) – using the new regulation to ridicule the attitudes of many jingoistic (Brexiteer) Brits:
Thanks to Brexit, we can finally keep those bastards from Kent out of Great Britain! Remember the people of Kent are economic migrants and only want to cross the border to steal our benefits and impose their way of life on us. It's time to take back control. #Kexit
— Boris Johnson #StayAlertControlTheVirus ᵖᵃʳᵒᵈʸ (@GetBrexit_Done) September 23, 2020
I hate those people from east Kent. Coming over here and taking our jobs and our women. #Kexit
— David__Osland (@David__Osland) September 23, 2020
I'm assuming all the take back kentrol jokes haves been made? late to #kexit party
— Chris Roberts (@OneEyeGrey) September 23, 2020
Singled out for mockery is arch-Brexiteer Nigel Farage:
— K 🌸 🦋 🖤💚 (@dreamingalonee) September 23, 2020
Kent's national currency is known as the Farage or colloquially as a Nigel. It's not recognized anywhere else because instead of ink the notes are stamped in bullshit. #Kexit
— John Smith (son of Harry Leslie Smith) (@Harryslaststand) September 23, 2020
They point out that the policy move is an insult to Scotland:
Wonder how Nicola and the Scottish nationalists are going to feel about Kent getting to leave the Union before them 🤔 #Kexit
— Not Andrea Jenkyns MP (@BlandreaJ) September 23, 2020
— pom (@pomDeter) September 23, 2020
Eh hello we are first in the queue for independence …..wait your turn Kent #Kexit
— Gill Durham 🇪🇺🏴 (@GillDurham) September 23, 2020
*Kent Access Permit*
— Britgirl's Hates Brexit #FBPE (@MarieAnnUK) September 23, 2020
Speculation has been rife about the EU’s response:
I bet Michael Barnier is pissing himself laughing about #Kexit
From the EU's point of view, it must be like watching an octopus tie itself into knots, so it can swim faster.
— Mandoline 🍄 (@Mandoline_Blue) September 23, 2020
#Kexit Sandwich to be renamed Baguette.
— Chris Hicks (@ChrisHicks50) September 23, 2020
It is, after all, particularly ironic:
— Mark Kelly (@marylandmarky) September 23, 2020
But at least there is an oven-ready excuse for this additional border: Kent already has a Deal.
— The Poke (@ThePoke) September 23, 2020
Have YOU donated to my crowdfunding appeal, raising funds to fight false libel claims by TV celebrities who should know better? These court cases cost a lot of money so every penny will help ensure that wealth doesn’t beat justice.
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