How Sunak Can Cling to Power – is this the best April Fool of them all, because it’s plausible?

Rishi Sunak: has he actually received any communications like the satirical memo from “Jon Swift II”? If so, did it put an expression like this on his face?

An organisation called 99% has produced a document that it alleges was passed to it by a member with contacts close to the government – and which purports to show how Rishi Sunak can win the next election.

It’s clearly an April Fool’s joke because it is apparently a memo from “Jon Swift II” – a reference to the satirist Jonathan Swift.

The trouble is, in places it seems alarmingly plausible.

In the section marked “Disinform“, for example, it states:

With the support of the media, it is still possible to persuade many people that the UK is suffering from global issues and handling them better than other countries.

I am impressed by the work that Chancellor Hunt is doing – given current performance, it is not easy to maintain a stance that the UK has the fastest growth rate in the G7, but he seems able to deliver the line straight to camera. And he has positioned himself (and you) well to take credit for the inevitable fall in inflation.

Indeed. Note that the UK’s growth rate may take on a much weaker quality if it is examined over a period of several years – and of course the fall in inflation is inevitable and has nothing to do with the Tories.

Remember also that a fall in inflation doesn’t mean prices will drop. It just means they will rise at a slower rate, so those effective pay cuts everybody has been taking don’t look so clever now, do they?

A subdivision marked “Divide the population” states:

Anti-immigrant rhetoric works extremely well, especially coupled with “over stretched public services”.

It continues:

I would single out Suella Braverman for her use of inflammatory rhetoric – it is no small achievement to blame 40,000 economically inactive (at government insistence) people for the economic woes of 68 million.

Finally, for this article, a section marked “Destroy” calls on Sunak to

Destroy democracy: make it practically impossible to elect any other party.

You need a plausible excuse to delay the elections if you cannot win them, and that will require violence on the streets (which you must be able to blame on your opponents, of course).

So far, the violence has been on the part of far-right groups, so you need to change that. Your policy of criminalising climate protests and inflaming the workers’ strikes is sound. I am sure it is not beyond your abilities to find ways of ensuring that some of these erupt into violence.

How interesting. I find it highly credible that the Tories are criminalising protests and attacking striking workers to create left-wing violence threats  – in the mind of the general public, at least.

The memo concludes:

I need not remind you that, should you relinquish power, an incoming administration would set up investigations and inquiries into corruption and other issues which would be extremely damaging to you and your party.

Fake, it may be – but it seems some of the threats in this document are all-too-real.

Source: How Sunak Can Cling to Power – 99%


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1 thought on “How Sunak Can Cling to Power – is this the best April Fool of them all, because it’s plausible?

  1. Jonathan Lisle-Summers

    I’m already aware that Starmer is so useless that it’s going to be hard for the Tories to lose. All they have to do is carry on. Labour’s lead is softer than butter on a hot day. Very depressing.
    As usual, Labour is fighting the previous General Election which was won by being vague – “get Brexit done” was the policy and the whole of the policy.
    Labour produced the best, most detailed Manifesto of my lifetime. Which few got around to reading because of the Corbyn smear campaign.
    This time we need proper worked through policies. Instead we’re getting misty washes without substance as per the appallingly bad Miliband version. It’s a loser.

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