Want to know what Brandon Lewis’s privatised fire service will look like? It’ll look like this

<RING RING!> <RING RING!> <RING RING!>

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“Nine-nine-nine emergency; which service do you require?”

“Fire service, please.”

“Thank you! Your fire service today will be provided by G5S/CrApiTOS. Putting you through…”

<click>

“Hi! Your fire and rescue services today are sponsored by U-None Insurance – when U need a payout from us, U get None!”

“At last! I need you to come to -”

“One moment, caller! How will you be paying for today’s service? We take Visa, Mastercard, Maestro, PayPal, Bitcoin or blood.”

“Huh?”

“We take-”

“Forget it. It’s too late now. The fire is everywhere. There’s no way out for me, even if you could get here in time.”

“Okay. We’ll bill your heirs for this call.”

That’s the Conservative privatised fire and rescue service – if it is ever allowed to happen.

They’ll make you pay, or they’ll make you pay with your life. Is your credit good enough?

Don’t let it happen.

All 46 fire and rescue services in England could be sold off to private firms under secret Government plans.

Local government minister Brandon Lewis calls for new laws that “would enable fire and rescue authorities in England to contract out their full range of services to a suitable provider” in a letter obtained by the Mirror.

He continues: “I appreciate that the proposals are not without controversy; however these changes will help remove barriers and to increase choices that fire and rescue authorities have to contract out their services.”

Source: Privatised fire and rescue services: Secret Government plans to sell off 46 fire and rescue services revealed – Mirror Online

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8 Thoughts to “Want to know what Brandon Lewis’s privatised fire service will look like? It’ll look like this”

  1. Barry Davies

    Privatisation has failed so let’s implement more, costly nonsense, perhaps we will have a plaque on the house so that the company knows if you are registered wth them, that worked well didn’t it ?

  2. And where there is no profit to be had there will be no service at all.

  3. Dave Rowlands

    Why is the government even allowed secret plans? Everything they want to do should be listed in their manifesto (mind you the conservatives never follow through with the lies that get them voted into power anyway), absolute disgrace to allow this to happen, the privatisation of government will be next under this rabble.

  4. Ian hatch

    Pehaps a scheme similar to the USA – The emgency services are funded through taxes, but still rely heavily on volunteers. Perhaps the UK has enough able bodied men and women to give some of their time to training and attending emegencies. It would require employer agreement to allow them to attend emegencies. OR, be like Puerto ico – the supplies are there, just no group competent to distribute them

    1. Mike Sivier

      Or we could carry on with the perfectly good system we have now, with the return of the decent pension and retirement scheme the Tories snatched from our firefighters.

  5. That is a BRILLIANT analogy Mike.

    1. Mike Sivier

      Thank you!

  6. Ray

    Nothing would surprise me with the tory`s they would sell there grandmother if there was money in it.

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